I Wish the Homos Could Be Happy

A couple days ago my wife walked past a table in the restaurant where we both languish. She overheard someone make the comment "I saw that the gays have been protesting again. You know they protest because they're unhappy people".

People this ignorant should be forced to submit to a beating just for speaking out loud. And they had children with them, so, of course, the kids'll grow up hearing about how the "gays" need our pity and sympathy, and the "gays" need our charity to get by, and the "gays" need us to be ever so nice to them because they'll never be content on their own. No matter what they do, as long as they're queer, they'll never be happy. Goddam, and here I thought "gay" MEANT happy.

I find it difficult to believe that a person can be so naive as to actually convince themselves of something like this. I realize the Bible says faggots go to hell, but it also says that God loves all his creations. It doesn't leave any out. Also, as the story goes, if you accept Jesus as your savior, you're in. No stipulations about "gay" this, or "homo" that.

All these rules that people make up, it's absurd. We don't discriminate against gay animals, and yet instances of homosexuality in the wild are common as houseflies. Let's be perfectly honest here: this God you believe in, this one-and-only omnipotent God; he created EVERYTHING, right? No, don't try to weasel out of it with some half-baked argument your pastor concocted when he was drunk last week, just answer the fuckin question. Did your God create everything? I thought so. Therefore he's responsible for everything that goes on here. He is in control. You idiots say that all the time when bad stuff happens; "Don't worry, God has a plan".

If God created everything, then he's responsible for homosexuality, too. There's no way around this. People throw around words like "abberation" and "unnatural". Let me tell you something; those words don't mean anything. In the entire universe, there are only natural occurences, there is nothing unnatural. And there can be no abberations, because God has a plan. I'm not sure how you folks understand "omnipotent," but when an omnipotent dude makes a plan, there are no abberations. Can't be. Look up "omnipotent" if this confuses you. Therefore, if God is in control, nothing has surprised him. Not Adam and Eve fuckin up the Garden, not Cain killing Abel, and certainly not the millenia of constant homosexual activity that have led to the year 2006 CE.

So. God has created homos for you, the Christians, to save. It's the only explanation. They are a challenge, not an abberation. I'm sure he and his son are tired of you whining to them all day long about how much you want a pony. He created butt sex solely so he could hate it. Then, he created people that want to have butt sex all the time. Then, he told you that he just couldn't stand these people. He told you that it's your job to "correct" whatever it is that's wrong with them. What's funny is that he ALREADY loves them. What's even funnier is that he made them the way they are. And you can't correct them any more than they can correct you. And believe me, you need it more than the gays do. This is where God gets his kicks. Watching you hapless morons scramble around and try to figure out What Jesus Would Do. You know what Jesus would do? He'd have compassion and sympathy for anyone in front of him. You should try that sometime instead of pity and superiority.

It's a shame you fuckers are cursed with free will. You're not using it and you'd be so much happier without it.