Who Cares?

I read in the paper today that the world is in grave danger. Apparently, we are on the cusp of having "BC" and "AD" totally replaced with "BCE" and "CE". I would imagine that most of you know that "BC" is "Before Christ" and "AD" is "Anno Domini", or "year of our lord". Whoops. I mean Lord. Sorry. "BCE" stands for "Before Common Era," and, naturally, "CE" is "Common Era."

These terms have been in use by virtually every portion of the global intellectual community for years. Pick up any modern book pertaining to history, philosophy, sociology, archaeology, etc, and you'd be hard pressed to find "BC" or "AD" in them, unless there's a "BCE" or "CE" directly after them. These terms are anachronisms, and it's time everyone faced that.

The article I read was in the Lexington paper, and, predictably, Kentucky Christians are in an uproar. They cite the long and venerable history these terms have enjoyed (2000 years, or less than half of recorded history), how everyone in the world is used to it (except for 67% of the world's population, who don't worship Jesus), and how these terms are part of our heritage (along with owning black people, growing weed, and not letting women vote).

Keeping "BC" and "AD" in the common vernacular is as goofy as goofy gets. The measurement of time is not another excuse for folks to advertise their religion. For fuck's sake, Jesus is everywhere. You can't swing a dead cat around here without knocking out four born-again assholes that want to talk to you about their savior. Give it a rest. You love Jesus. Everyone KNOWS you love Jesus. Stop bugging the rest of the world when they won't pay attention to your small-minded, paltry, selfish excuse for spirituality. How many perfectly viable calendars have you people ruined in an effort to align most of your major holidays with pagan rituals that you worked so hard to get rid of? Jesus was NOT born on December 25th. The rest of the planet is NOT totally kosher with you guys marking the "before" and "after" of your self-important history with the spurious birth and death dates of Jesus. I might add that Jesus lived in one of the most diligently recorded periods of human existence. Why is it, then, that his life is only recorded in one book?

Please don't bother me with your fear of change masquerading as religious righteousness. The Rebublicans are in power right now, and they're writing their own ticket. When they lose power, they're going to have to face certain realities. Number motherfucking one is that the wall between church and state is going to remain just where Thomas Jefferson and all the other framers put it right before they went to bring in their crop of dope, refuse to pay taxes to Big Government, and have sex with their slave girls. We're GONNA call the shit "BCE" and "CE". Bitch about stem cells.